Passenger

I’m a college Junior. I’m unsure about my major, my vocation, my plans for life, even my plans for next semester. And I’m a planner. Not having a plan makes me pretty anxious. So the assumption that I think and pray a lot about what God want’s me to do, is very true. I go through stages of trusting in Him, thinking I have it all figured out, and being extremely confused. At certain points in my life I have focused too much on what God wants from me in the future instead of focusing on Him. This can be very distracting. 

The other day I was driving home from adoration and OneRepublic’s song, Passenger, came on. I’ve heard the song a hundred times before, but this time a particular line of the lyrics really caught my attention. It said, “All that you want is standing right in front of you. All that you need is love.” I was reminded, after listening to that line, that I’m constantly searching. I’m searching for what my future will be, what God wants it to be, what I want it to be. But I can’t do or be who God wants me to be if I’m constantly looking ahead instead of living in the moment and focusing on what He wants from me NOW. If I truly want to be who God wants me to be, I need to realize that God has plans for me now, today, at this very moment, and that I need to be working on following those instructions instead of focusing my time and attention on what is to come. 

“All that you want is standing right in front of you. All that you need is love.” If God is love, all that I need is God. 1 John 4:18 says, “perfect love casts out fear,” I don’t have to worry about what I need to be doing if I am following God and listing to what He wants from me at the moment. If I’m with him, loving Him and allowing Him to love me, He will take away my fear. If I’m following him, how can I get lost? It’s when I get impatient that I try to take the wheel that I end up getting lost and confused. I know many people my age, like myself, struggle with letting God be in control and them be in the passenger seat. But thank God for the little reminders He gives us throughout the day like the OneRepublic song. And thank God for His grace that opens our ears and eyes to hear and see what is right in front of us when our eyes are looking so far ahead.

Lately I’ve been looking to Mary as a role model. The trust that she showed in saying “yes” to God is beautiful, and it is the kind of faith I pray to have. Yesterday I read a quote by Pope Francis that really goes along with being patient and letting God be in control. He said, “Mary is not in a hurry… She does not get carried away by events, but when it’s clear what God asks of her she does it quickly.” I pray that I can have the faith, trust, and patience that Mary has always had. And I pray that I let God be the driver, while I stay in the passenger seat.